Thursday 4 July 2013

Terror weapons should LOOK terrifying. And preferably sound it too.

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3032/3079204541_6319dc9e42.jpg


       These scary-looking beasts are Ju87 stuka dive bombers. Nazi Germany's premier terror weapon in their years of conquest. The best dive bomber in the world - british test pilot Eric Brown said it was "In a class of its own" - it dived almost vertically, delivering munitions with an accuracy unsurpassed until the advent of smart weaponry. With its fixed, spatted undercarriage and cranked wings it resembles a bird of prey stooping on its victim. It couldn't look more predatory if it was designed to. But the nazis reckoned that being dive bombed wasn't terrifying enough. Brutal crop-headed Luftwaffe generals like Wolfram Von Richtofen wondered, how can we make those fleeing columns of refugees REALLY scared?
        So they bolted on propeller-driven sirens, dubbed 'Jericho trumpets'. You can see one attached to the left undercarriage leg on the leading aircraft. The resultant howl has become a symbol of the blitzkrieg. Enough to freeze the blood of the helpless targets on the ground. You'll have heard it onscreen, as it become so iconic that you hear it dubbed onto film footage of any old aircraft crashing.
         Check it out here. And you'll also see where Francis Ford Coppola got the idea for the helicopter attack in Apocalypse Now. And Joseph Beuys was the rear gunner in one.

         About the only modern contender for the stuka's crown is this...

...
...the russian MI24 'Hind' gunship. Not the most sophisticated attack helicopter in the world, but definately the scariest. It's got the predatory look, like a giant insect on the hunt. And it shares the stuka's awesome reputation for doling out death to helpless civilians. The soviets used them in Afghanistan, where a mujahideen fighter - yeah, the same ones that we're fighting today, now rebranded as the taliban - said "We do not fear the russians, but we fear their helicopters". And the sudanese are currently slaughtering hapless peasants with them in Darfur.
    Nukes and smart bombs are efficient enough. But they don't LOOK scary enough.They could at least paint shark's teeth on the missiles.

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